Believe in People: Addiction, Recovery & Stigma
2024 British Podcast Award Winner & Radio Academy Award Nominated Podcast
Believe in People explores addiction, recovery and stigma with different people.
If you or someone you know is struggling with addiction then this podcast can help.
Believe in People: Addiction, Recovery & Stigma
#48 - Adam Maxted: Love Island, Professional Wrestling, Reality TV, Steroids & Image Enhancing Drugs, Instant Gratification Culture, WWE & Redefining Fame
Adam Maxted, professional wrestler and Love Island reality TV star joins Matt for a candid conversation about life in entertainment.
Adam shares his extraordinary journey, starting from the wrestling scene in Ireland, where opportunities were limited, to the transformative experience of participating in Love Island. He discusses how the show significantly boosted his career, leading to a dramatic increase in recognition and the birth of "Big Flex".
Adam addresses the mental and physical challenges he faced, including the toll of steroid use, the pressures of sudden fame, and the criticism from wrestling fans. The conversation covers the emotional highs and lows of his career, highlighting a missed WWE contract and a rigorous, yet unsuccessful, audition for UK Gladiators.
Matt explores Adam's reflections on instant gratification culture, particularly in bodybuilding, and the misconceptions surrounding steroid use. He shares personal experiences with fame and public perception, emphasising the unrealistic expectations placed on his lifestyle. The discussion underscores the importance of personal responsibility, showcasing Adam's efforts to redefine his identity beyond his reality TV persona.
Through honest discussions about maintaining a certain physique and the importance of post-cycle therapy for steroid users, Adam highlights the values of discipline, resilience, and self-acceptance. His story offers valuable insights into navigating personal trauma, breaking down stigmas associated with seeking help, and ultimately finding a path to personal growth and fulfilment.
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Believe in People explores addiction, recovery and stigma.
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We'd like to extend our heartfelt thanks to Christopher Tait of the band Belle Ghoul & Electric Six for allowing us to use the track Jonathan Tortoise. Thank you, Chris, for being a part of this journey with us.
This is a Renew Original Recording. Hello and welcome to the Believe in People podcast, a 2024 Radio Academy Award nominated podcast to talk all things addiction recovery and stigma. I'm Matthew Butler and I'm your host, or, as I like to say, your facilitator. Today, I have with me Adam, known for his time on Love Island and his career in professional wrestling. He discusses his experiences with steroid use, including the physical and mental impacts, the stigma around these drugs and the importance of post-cycle therapy. He talks about a WWE contract that fell through due to a misunderstanding in a background check and reflects on his rigorous yet unsuccessful audition for the UK gladiators. Throughout, adam emphasises mental health, personal growth and resilience, highlighting how these experiences have shaped his life and his career. Adam, thank you so much for joining me on the Believing People podcast. It is a pleasure to have you here.
Speaker 2:It's a pleasure to be here my man. I'm looking forward to this.
Speaker 1:Do you know what? Obviously, the fact that this is a bit cheeky of me really, the fact that we are friends in real life is me kind of capitalising on that of your social media presence and your fame. Let's not, let's not lie about that. But also there are very interesting things that I'd like to talk to you about that you might not necessarily been open with with people before as well. But a little bit about yourself. Obviously, you're known for being on love island, but you're also known as being a professional wrestler as well, so could you share a bit about your journey from being a love island contestant and becoming a professional wrestler?
Speaker 2:well. So this is the thing people don't realize. Well, some people like I was wrestling before I did love island the first time, but not many people knew that. They thought, oh, you're just this guy that's trying to be a pro wrestler. But I'd already been wrestling for like six, seven months back in ireland and back then there was no real opportunities, like in wrestling to make a name for yourself. So I was wrestling maybe once every two to three months and, as you know, as a wrestler like to build up your reps. When you're like green and you're new, you need to be in the ring consistently and there just wasn't the work there for me.
Speaker 2:So a cast and producer came in, actually did an audition for Take Me Out. I went to this empty hotel room, had to pretend to come down the lift, had to pretend to be dancing, like it was so awkward and they were like yeah, we're going to use it. And I thought you know what love? Uh, take me out is not as big a show as it used to be, it's a little bit more cheesy. So I said, guys, I'm not going to do it. I said thank you. And they were like well, we'll keep you in mind forever stuff. So a couple months passed and then this whole love island thing came up. They said do you want to apply for this? And I said, like it's a risk because you don't know how you're going to be portrayed, but it could also really help you take off. And obviously it did. As soon as I finished that series, what? Back in 2016, series two, I was wrestling all over the UK like two, three times a week. Do you know?
Speaker 1:what I mean.
Speaker 2:So going from two to three times a month, or you know, in the months to then a week, was just really helped my career. So the show was good for me. But I think people don't realise that I was actually a wrestler before I did Love Island.
Speaker 1:Now you've said that it does trigger a memory, because my partner, my wife, she said do you know this person? Adam Mack said he says he's a wrestler. And I looked I was like no, I have no idea.
Speaker 2:So obviously you was months in, but I guess that that's. That's the interesting thing for me. You realize how big the scene was. That I was maybe oblivious to, but I didn't know. No, so like I didn't know how big the wrestling scene was in the uk before I ever, because I'd never wrestled in england I was just hoping that maybe one day I could break out of ireland and maybe get to a big company, obviously at the time wb. But I didn't realize that the england, like the uk, had a huge wrestling scene. So when I finished the show the first time I'm getting all these emails from all these companies I was like wow, like wrestling's massive in England. And then obviously met a girl at the time and moved over to England and was wrestling consistently. So you know I'm glad I did it. It really did open the doors for me and helped me start my wrestling career, you know.
Speaker 2:And you grew green as grass, seven months in our age you know, being the focal point of posters, love islands, adam max dead, and being so, so, so green, do you know? So there was, yeah, like I what I always say, I was not ready for those opportunities, but I did the show for a reason to get my name out there, because I wanted to be a professor. So it's kind of like sink or swim. It's kind of like this is what you asked for, this is the opportunities you were hoping for, so you need to go with it like. You need to like jump in.
Speaker 2:So I remember, though, thinking, like you know, wrestling fans especially I wasn't ready for the matches. I was so green, I was standing at like a sore thumb and they were probably thinking why is this guy on posters? Why is this guy getting hyped up as, like, this big thing and he's terrible? Like, do you mean? And it did it. Honestly, it really did get to me. Those first couple years, I was going on social media, I was going on twitter, as we, you know, as wrestlers sometimes did, and you were trying to see what people thought of your match, and it was just negative, negative, like this guy like looks the part, but he's terrible in the ring, or this guy's just a Love Island wanker. I was getting called and, like you know, send this guy back. Who does he think he is? And I think that's again. A lot of the fans didn't know that I was actually trying to become a wrestler before Love.
Speaker 2:Island they just thought I did the TV show and thought and I'll try and take over your world. So to be, to be fair, though, all my peers did say, like you know, you're so humble, you're so like dedicated, and you know, if you stick with this you will obviously become better. But it was a lot of pressure initially.
Speaker 1:But I'm still here, I'm still funny enough that that reminds me, because when we was working on the the butlin scene, I remember being told that you was joining the team and it sounds harsh because I had just had that stereotype of love Ireland Jack's guy with a tan, this guy's going to be an asshole. And then when I met you I was like, oh my God, he's so nice, what a humble and lovely lad. And I remember you coming back from one of your matches and asking for advice and stuff. I was like, oh, he's a, he's a really good kid.
Speaker 2:But yeah, I think sometimes that stereotypes into people. I guess it's the, the stereotype. The stigma of it is is going to be that you just don't, you're just a jacked up asshole. And I had this the other day, literally two days ago.
Speaker 2:I've just joined a new gym in manchester and they're very strict with their rules and the woman that runs it she's you know, she's quite masculine, she's like on the ball. Like she came over and was like you know, if you're gonna, you know, leave your weights like more than five minutes, and do you know? I mean, I was like I'm super saddened, but she was like the other day she was like I expected you to be such a dickhead. She was like when I saw you come in and join, I was kind of knocked. She was like I was going to maybe persuade you not to join this gym. She was like I thought you were going to be your typical influencer and she was like, honestly, we all thought you were going to be such a bellend. And it's sad like people do judge you before giving you the opportunity to kind of show them what you're about.
Speaker 1:But I'm used to it and that comes with I guess, that being you know, I'll use the word famous, and that is what happens when you are on a series like Love Island. So how did you cope with that sudden and, I guess, the transient fame that came with being a contestant on Love Island and how did that influence your, I guess, personal life, particularly in terms of mental health and, as we're just saying, then the public perceptions and expectations?
Speaker 2:I think back at 24 I was just happy to like ride the wave, do you mean? Like again being from belfast, quite a small city, quite narrow-minded, everyone knows everyone. If you're trying to make some of yourself, people kind of don't get behind you. They think, why can't you just be happy doing a nine-to-five and having a normal life? But I always knew that I wanted more for myself. So, obviously, getting the opportunity to do this big tv show I was, like you know, living in England then and I don't know, I just think people, you know, they do think, just because you've done a tv show, especially like Love Island, that you know you're fame hungry or you're trying to be a celebrity and to a degree there's people that, yes, they do want to use the show for that. But that was never my intention, like honestly, like I just saw as an opportunity to try and become a pro wrestler and if you watch how I behaved on that first season, like I was quite I don't want to say boring, but I was quite.
Speaker 2:I was quite quiet at times but that's because I went in with the mindset of like, don't say the wrong thing, don't rub someone up the wrong way, don't do anything with girls.
Speaker 2:Because I was so focused on WB at the time I was like I don't want to come across, I don't want to give them any ammunition as to like not sign me because of something I did on TV. Because I knew people would start Googling like who's this wrestler? So I knew if there was any bad things that I'd done on TV that you know Love Island would have put up on YouTube and stuff at the time it would affect me. So I know I wasn't myself but the wave, I enjoyed it. Like I was doing nightclub appearances and a young lad I mean, I was having fun. But doing it this time I'm glad I got to do it as I'm older now so I was able to go in and show a bit more maturity and I probably, if I'm honest, I've probably struggled with it more now as I'm older than I did when I was 24, because a lot more conscious of it all.
Speaker 2:I guess, yeah, but like even just people think, like I was saying before we came on, like people think, because I've done the show, that like I'm rich now or I'm successful or my life's like sorted, and like I live in Manchester now. I live about 10 minutes from the Arndale Centre where I go to Aldi to get my food shop every week, right, and I'm walking home every week with about four or five shopping bags and I see people look at me as I'm walking in the street doing a double take, going like there's Adam from Love Island. And then I'll see them look at me and go almost like why is he walking home with his shopping bikes? Do you mean like they? They maybe think you're a celebrity, you should be getting your food delivered to your house because you've got this money, you've got this lavish lifestyle and I'm like I'm six foot two, I'm jacked, I can, I can walk home with shopping.
Speaker 2:That's my mindset. I'm not going to change who I am to as a court, to my core, as a person, just because I've done a TV show. But there have been a couple of times where I've even gone a different route home because I've wanted to be seen by less people, because it has got to me because I do see them staring. And then recently I've just been like do you know what? Like, fuck it. Like it's who I am Like.
Speaker 2:Why would I not go to a shopping center to get my shopping and walk on with it, see myself like better or bigger than anyone, just because I've been on a dating show twice and I've been on tv for a few weeks, like some people go on that show and, yes, they want to be known as a influencer or a reality tv person and like that's fine, like that's cool. But I know that I'm more than that and I don't want my identity to just be a love island person like I want to be known as, like you know, adam that did love island but also does all this stuff, and not just like adam from love island, you know well.
Speaker 1:Going back to the second season, I was quite surprised that you did go on again because obviously in the length of time that I've known you, one of your sort of hang-ups, I'll say previously was just being known as adam from love island and people recognizing you for that and not the way that you're doing as a professional wrestler. So it was quite surprising when you said you was going to go going again. What was it that influenced your decision to put yourself in that, in that position again?
Speaker 2:it was where I was in life as a man I was, as you know, as a, as a close friend got very close to making wb a couple years ago. I thought that that was it. My dream was going to come true. And you know from my, from my wrestling career started, people were always saying to me, like you're going to make it, you know, as soon as wbc, how you look like, how green you are, for example, back then they'll sign you, they'll take you to america, they'll train you up, you'll become this big star. So in my head I was like, yes, it's going to happen.
Speaker 2:And obviously got the wb contract offer during what? Just before covid, when nxt uk was still a thing, and that was it. Regal on the phone to me was like adam, you know, we're going to start you in the uk. But I reckon he said in a couple months you'll be in america because of how you look, you're so marketable. And I was. You know he was selling me this dream and I was like this is going to happen. You know, I mean, and the girl I was with at the time, like she had been paying on the bit all the bills for a couple of years, because I said, look, I need to focus on long run. So obviously got the contract offer. They did the background check as they do and not assign people. And if you remember speaking out in wrestling- at the time was a really big thing.
Speaker 2:So they did a background check on me, saw that I used to be a buff butler years ago, which again I've spoke about this like I walked around in an apron and handed out like champagne to girls at hem parties and stuff. I wasn't like this mad stripper. But for whatever reason the people in america probably not knowing that, they just thought we're not going to sign this guy because we don't want any more dirt on our name, basically. So they even sent him on the phone. They're like look, we can't be seen to be releasing people from contracts for doing some shady stuff in their past but then signing you who used to be this kind of, in their head, stripper butler.
Speaker 2:So I remember in the space of a week I went from the high and the celebratory feelings and I was on holiday at the time and I was like I was buzzing. I was like as soon as I get from home from this holiday I'll be signed by wb. There's the contract. I had a screenshot on my phone. I was like all that I've worked for the past couple years is going to pay off now. And then within a week I got a phone call saying, hey, um, you know this isn't going to happen.
Speaker 2:you know what I mean, because that has been my goal and it has been my dream and I think I didn't lose my passion for wrestling. But I just had to look myself in the mirror and go okay, if this isn't going to happen. I'm getting a little bit older now. I was probably like maybe 27, 28. At the time I was like what else can I do? And that's when I went back to Marbella and did kind of feel like I was going backwards in life because I was working in the nightlife scene again. I was working in nightclubs. I was in a nightclub till 4 or 5 am around people getting drunk, like people getting fucked up, and I would sit there and just go like this isn't me, but the money was very good and I'd always I'd worked in Marbella in my early 20s. So I've made a lot of good connections. I knew a lot of good people.
Speaker 2:It's a great place but, I, always knew again that I was meant for more. But I kind of went back to there as, because it was like a safety net, I was like, well, I don't really want to live in the UK because I'm not feeling it, but I can go live in Spain, have a great life, make good money. But part of me inside was like this isn't me, so like I was there and I was lost and like I think, as a man, when you, when you don't know what your purpose is or you're waking up every day figuring out like what am I meant to be doing? And those that's what I had every day. I was waking up just going, like you know, I thought I was gonna be this pro wrestler and I'd be on a big scale and I could really use my platform to help people and show people that if you work hard, you can become something and anything you set your mind to. And I felt like a bit of a failure because I got so close and it all fell through and people say, oh, yeah, but it's not your. But part of me kind of did think, well, if I hadn't done that in my past, I'd probably be in america now, could be on the main roster now, like I mean, like these are the thoughts that I still have daily.
Speaker 2:But I remember just being in spain and they messaged me. A cast member just said hey, adam, I work for itv. Can we give you a call this week? So they rang me up and they were like we might be doing this season of all stars where we're going to bring people that have done love island before we're going to bring them back. And I just remember sitting there going like, like why not? I've kind of gotten off on the loose, like I'm kind of that forgotten about, like. And you know another thing I talk about the sort of walking home with the shopping bags, the judgment. I would be stood in the streets of marbella saying, you know, not like pr and as such, but like because I was the manager of a team and people walk past me and go aren't you, adam from love island? Like, why are you on the streets of marbella?
Speaker 2:they'd be like love island obviously didn't do very well for you, but, like you know, I mean that's sort of judgment, yeah, and I had that like over there and like that was that was tough to handle as well, because people again people just presume that because you've done a tv show, that you're this big celebrity or you're famous or your life's set, then and it's not true one or two people will make it huge, like molly may, for example and probably probably from my series alex bowen and olivia.
Speaker 2:They did the best, but not many people that go on that show go on to become like big things, especially in that influencer world. Girls definitely will. They get this sort of the cloven deals, the brand deals, but for men we don't really get much, unless you're like a really handsome guy, which I'm not bad, but do you mean like it's? Men don't really get much from it.
Speaker 1:It's short term as well, isn't it? It's like, I mean, you're hot, you sort of the hot top for 12 months and the next season comes out and then it's on to the next.
Speaker 2:But yeah, and it just, it moves on I just like I said, I just didn't want that to be my identity. So they rang me and they said look, do you want to do this? And I said you know what? It might be a sign from the universe that I'm feeling a bit lost and it might have led to something. So that was really again. It wasn't like oh, I'm lonely and I'm trying to find a girlfriend and I'm getting a bit older, so maybe I'll find love again. Like again, people do lie and say, oh, I'm trying to find love, my life like you're, not you're going.
Speaker 2:You're going on the show because you want you want to use it for a business, exactly, or you want to become successful, or you want to be instagram famous, and if that's your intentions, absolutely fine. Like I don't judge anyone, because it wasn't mine, I just want to be a pro wrestler and if you meet someone in there, you like amazing. I'm not saying it can't happen. Alex Bone and Olivia have like two kids now, nathan and Cara from my series. They're still married with kids, so it can happen. But I think, as it's gone on, people have gone. Do you know what? I don't want to work in nine to five, so I'll just go on Love Island and there's, you know, there have some deep chats with younger guys about their mindset and stuff, and I remember there's a couple of girls and I said you know, what do you want to do? And they were like oh, we've got no work ethic, we don't really want to work, we just want to go on Love Island and they're like.
Speaker 1:They're like 18, 19 years old, and I was like what do you mean?
Speaker 2:they're like no, and I think it's just as good as the show is and as popular as it is. I do feel like it's sending out the wrong message to the younger generation. That, one again, it's all about how you look and you're valued about your looks. And if you don't look a certain way for men, if you don't have good hair, good for girls, if you don't have the perfect bikini body, or do you mean like you're not seen as attractive? I think it's just sending out maybe the wrong message to the younger generation. Like, as you get older, you sort of learn to accept yourself and you kind of just watch the show for what it is. But I think when you're younger and your mind's still developing, it can put so much pressure on I need to look like this, or I need to behave like this, or the younger guys need to be like fuck boys, to keep jumping. So I think it's it's sending out the wrong message.
Speaker 1:Do you say the show's sending out the wrong message? Don't you think that, having gone on that show a second time and looking the way you do the hair, the physical appearance, do you not think you're contributing to that message? Did that cross your mind?
Speaker 2:I mean, that's what I say. When I say stuff like this, I'm like I can never really Criticise it too much. Crit's not for me. I've done it twice, so I sound like people probably say, oh well, you're sounding hypocritical. But as I've worked on myself and my mindset and the person I am now, it's like there's so much more to someone than just how they look. And as you get older, your looks deteriorate and it's more about you know your values, your morals, your principles, like how you treat people. You know the the good work you're trying to do to help other people.
Speaker 2:I think you know a real thing for me now is being in service to people. As I've got older, I want to help more people. I don't. I want to use my platform to help people. I don't want to just get brand deals or a protein company going. You know we'll give you 10 off if you endorse our protein. Do you mean it's like, yeah, I want to use my platform if you call it, you know to actually try and help people. And you know when people, when people say, oh, you're famous, you're a celebrity, I'm like I'm not. I'm like please don't call me that. I'm like I'm just adam, that is in decent shape. But you know, and we can talk about it, that came from being bullied when I was younger people, you know people probably think, oh, you're self-obsessed, or you're showing to the gym because you went on love and or you, you got in shape to go on. A tv show like this started years ago when I was like big flex, is it?
Speaker 1:yeah, when was big flex born? When was big flex born? That is the question. Yeah, because I've seen pictures of you when you were younger, you know.
Speaker 2:I mean you still, you still look okay, but half of what you do know, half, but probably like half the size you are yeah, no, I just like I was bullied a lot, like didn't I never met my dad, so I never had a faber figure, and my mum, bless her, was very protective because my mum had a very bad childhood traumatising, really bad. So when she had me she wanted to cover me in cotton wool. Do you know what I mean? I remember I was going to a house party one night. My mum comes all the way out and sticks her head in the car to check that I had my seatbelt on. She goes have you got your seatbelt on, son? And I'm in front of all my peers. I'm like mom, like, but that's just how she was and like, bless her, like, to her credit, I don't like.
Speaker 2:I mean like we had arguments back then, but I just got bullied a lot for being a mummy's boy and for being soft and kind of being a bit of a pushover. And I remember one night these two guys followed me home in a taxi and beat me up and I didn't even try and fight back, I just took the beating, I just didn't, I didn't try and defend myself and I just remember after being like I don't want to feel like that again, like that helpless, so I was in the next day. I was in the gym. I'm like do you know what? If I get big, if I get jacked, people might think twice about fucking with me. And, to be fair, no one's fucked with me since.
Speaker 2:Since I got in shape, no one has messed with me. But that's also down to me. I don't put. Do you mean, like I always, if I go into a bar, for example, to watch the football, I will always do like almost like a risk assessment when I walk in that bar, I'll scan the room, I'll see groups of guys. I'll go okay, if that group had too many, there could be a potential, there could be something kicking off there. Do you mean? And that's just how I am like? It's not like I live on edge no, but it's just that's.
Speaker 1:I guess you could call it somewhat of a trauma response to being yeah, like I'm trying to defend myself, being attacked, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2:Being a bigger guy. In my mind it's like a shield of armor, it's like a defense mechanism.
Speaker 1:Does it also make you a target in a weird way? Do people not think I'm going to fuck with the biggest guy here?
Speaker 2:When they're drunk, maybe when people are sober. No, the most things for men is like jeez, you're a big lad, or you're a big lad.
Speaker 2:But, oh, you think you're a bit like, do you know? I mean people change when they drink. But that's really what led me to gym was like I don't want to feel defenseless anymore and since I got you know, big and in shape, like no one has messed with me. But I think that's like I'm saying you have to take accountability of what situations you allow yourself to get into, what environments you're putting yourself into. Like, if you know there's a bar that, yes, a lot of girls might go to, but there's a lot of rough guys that are maybe going to kick off, maybe you don't go to that bar if you're not looking for trouble. Maybe you go to the quieter place where you can sit and enjoy your night and get home safe because, like, you have all these traumatizing and traumatic things of like what guy a guy taking one punch on the wrong night out falls to the floor, hits his head and he's dead, do you mean? So I've just always kind of protecting myself in that way yeah.
Speaker 1:So obviously, I mean you've been quite open about this and this is one of the reasons why I'm really interested in talking to you is you haven't got to to where you are naturally, shall we say. But I think there's definitely a misconception with steroid use, where people think that just just by taking steroids and not necessarily working out, not eating right that you're going to see, you know, brilliant results from that. When did you first get introduced to steroids and what were some of the circumstances that led to steroid use?
Speaker 2:so it would have been like so I'm natural. Now like, yeah, people are like oh well, if you've taken steroids, you can't call yourself natural man yeah, and it's like it's not true.
Speaker 2:I don't think that's true at all. Like, do you mean? So? I would have first heard about steroids probably when I was younger. Obviously, like flex magazine, you're trying to get bigger. You see, like jay cutler, all these massive guys on magazines, and I never wanted to be that big but I really respected and admired like their physiques and I I remember I used to have a stack of flex magazines that was massive because I was trying to read everything. How did I get big? Like arnold schwarzenegger's bodybuilding encyclopedia, I had that, all these jay cutler flex magazines.
Speaker 2:So my two friends at the time, ben and chris, like they were pumped full of steroids and like, looking back now, they looked terrible, like horrendous. They were just balloons. They were just full of water with big puppy cheeks. But to me as a skinny guy, I was like, fuck, my mates are massive and they're like the same age as me. How are they so jacked? So that's really probably when I first started and also, being that skinny guy, I was probably like you know, it'll maybe help me get bigger a little bit quicker. So that wasn't the case, though, like you still have to put the work in in the gym, but that's probably when I first sort of learned about steroids was when I got found my love for bodybuilding and also had friends and I took.
Speaker 2:You know like I've I've actually only taken test injections right twice in my life I swear once years ago when I was probably like 19 and then I started getting like these boils on my chest, like these horrible, like pink, purple boils on my chest which were from the gear that I was taking. That's why I got a chest piece to cover them. Yeah, but there's still like scar in there on my chest. So that's one of the things. Like you, you've got to weigh up all the sort of side effects. Is it worth it?
Speaker 2:Like I made a reel about it the other day, if you just want to be a big guy in a bar and have girls come up and go, geez, your arms are nice. It's not worth the risk taking steroids, the health, the anxiety, the mindset stuff and kind of probably getting sucked in and thinking that you've got to rely on that then forever. Do you mean, like I did them when I was younger, realized that like I put on a bit of size but I've actually maintained size without taking steroids, just through hard work, your nutrition, eating right, and also I knew I didn't want to be a pro bodybuilder. Like I know, I don't want to get on stage and put on tiny little. I mean I wrestle in tiny little Spanish pants.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I was going to say, yeah, but I knew I didn't want to be a pro bodybuilder. There's no money in bodybuilding. Yeah, like it's amazing, it's a great sport and I do love it, but it wasn't my goal and I knew, say, the second time I took tests was I was a little bit older. I was probably what I'm 32 now. I was maybe 29 when I was in Marbella and I was kind of like I'm a bit older now. I was like you know what. I might hop on something again and just see what happens and I put on a bit of size.
Speaker 2:But again, no-transcript failure. If you're not staying consistent, if you're not training for years to give your body time to adapt and actually build good muscle tissue because people say, over time you get muscle maturity and you get that dense, thick muscle if you're not doing that like jumping on steroids is not going to give you the answers that you want or the results that you want. If your nutrition is not on point, your sleep, your recovery, your hydration, your water there's so many things that you need to get right first and give a chance to work and then you can go. Okay, I feel like I've got to a really good place. Naturally I'm doing all this stuff. I've made good progress.
Speaker 2:If I want to get to the next level and actually try and pursue a career or a sport in bodybuilding or something that you know needs me to look a certain way now, I need steroids. But if you're just a guy that wants to get in shape, you can do it without steroids. Good nutrition, hit your protein, get the calories in that you need to get in and just train your fucking ass off and you will make progress. Yeah, steroids, you don't need them.
Speaker 1:Unless, like I say, you're trying to be a pro bodybuilder, you don't need steroids I guess the appealing thing for a lot of young people is when you look at the, the price of doing, like a, you know, a test cycle, and you look at um, all the um, like you know, protein shakes and all all this there's what's the word for it your supplements yes, that's the word supplements.
Speaker 1:When you're looking at all that and how expensive it can be and how confusing it can be, I think it's quite logical for these younger people to think I'll just take steroids because it's Steve M.
Speaker 2:But that's where we're at as well in the world instant gratification and people just wanting the quick fix Instead of going. You know what there's? There's beauty in the pain of sacrificing a couple of years. I'm going to have to bust my ass off.
Speaker 2:I'm going to have to train my legs. I'm not going to see progress for a while, but one day, through hard work and determination, I'll get there. That mindset is getting lost in this again. This younger generation of I don't want to work for stuff. So you know, I'll just do an OnlyFans or I'll just do this sort of work, because then I'm not having to do anything. That's difficult. Do you know what I mean? I think we're losing that grind and that work ethic over time and I, we need people that are going to go. Do you know what? No, I want to work for this, and then you'll be more proud as well. Like of like. You know, I did it myself. It took time.
Speaker 1:The instant gratification thing's interesting because one of the things I've been looking at recently was was we're gonna basically we're gonna have a generation of what they call a dopamine deficit, and that's because the generation that we have now are so used to getting those quick results, and it's down to anything. You know, you post a picture, you get likes, you get a dopamine release, you feel good about yourself. Oh look how popular I am. You know all this sort of stuff and even with, even with tv and netflix and having a two-year-old daughter, she'll watch something, and if she says she wants to watch it again, or if she wants to watch cast, I think when I was a kid, no, we only got our dopamine at set times a day.
Speaker 1:You know, 8 am in the morning before school, when we watched, you know, citv. When we got home, they had cartoons on for an hour and that was it. Now the cartoons are off, you're done. But children, because of smartphones and technology, we have access to everything at all times, whenever we want it. And it's basically saying that what we're going to do is create a generation where, um, we're going to rely on instant gratification, we're going to rely on those instant dopamine releases and it's just not. I guess there isn't the science there to look at. How is this going to affect the generation 20, 30, 40 years from now?
Speaker 2:because it's so new I like just getting addicted to gadgets and communicating like I've actually been writing. What do I call it? A project like more a curriculum of like how to help men become more confident and stuff. Because basically the building that I'm living at in Manchester there's a lot of like nerdy guys. They're a bit socially awkward and like obviously I've moved in and some of them would come to me and say, you know, adam, I've got a date tonight. You know how? Should I you know? Or they've had a date, adam, I said this and I've. You know, I'm not saying like do you know what? This is the thing on Love Island. My game right was terrible. I knew I was on TV again. I didn't want to say certain things. It was a bit of a pressured situation. When I go on dates now, like I back myself, I'm good. Right, I'm not saying I'm like hitch or anything, but I'm kind of like hitch for the building that I live in now.
Speaker 2:But there's so many men that don't know how to communicate with women, for example, because it's just for a phone, it's just for a dating app and then, when it comes to the real thing, they can't do it because they don't know how to interact with a human being now. So that's the world we're going into now. Everything's done through gadgets, free screens. Now we've got ai coming coming through like we're losing that human connection. You look around at public transport. I get so many trains for wrestling. People are constantly on their phone. No one just sits across from someone and goes.
Speaker 2:So how are you man or what do you do sometimes that could lead to an amazing friendship or connection for years, and it's almost you do that, you almost look as being the weird person for doing that.
Speaker 1:You start talking a stranger or something. They're looking at you. Why is this person so weird? Why are they talking to me? No man, it's just normal. This is how it should be.
Speaker 2:I think it's really sad you know what I mean like I had a girl on the train like a couple months ago that I was reading a book and she kept looking over and then she was just like, is that a good book?
Speaker 1:and I was like, well, you know, if you're so did you feel any external pressures from the entertainment or wrestling industry to maintain that certain physique? This is what you've become known for. This is why they're putting you on their posters. This is why they're booking. You don't not necessarily on talent or ability. Like you know, some people are one of your primary bookings are you saying I have no talent?
Speaker 1:no, I'm saying I'm saying you have zero, no, but but you, the poster boy, your image is a big thing for you. Do you know what I mean?
Speaker 2:No, there is. There's a lot of pressure, but it's something that I've taken pride in in day-to-day life anyway, I've always wanted to, especially from the bullying and becoming bigger. I've always wanted to stand out and just have something about me and have an aura. And even before wrestling I would walk down the street and people would turn heads, people would take notice, like who's that guy? And, yes, I'm a bigger guy, so people you know tend to take notice. But when I got into wrestling I was like, yeah, like I was probably I'm probably one of the bigger guys in in the uk scene, but if I go to america I'm gonna be, I'm gonna be one of the smallest. So there is that pressure and, if I'm honest, obviously I moved to manchester really recently and I've got my drive back for wrestling. I'm busy, I'm happy, I'm like getting consistent bookings again. I'm going from this month actually from July next month I'm going to go on a real run of like buttlings again and doing other things and I'll probably be wrestling probably three to four days a week again because I'm ready to dive back in and try and make stuff happen. So there's a lot more pressure coming back now full-time. Do still want to make it.
Speaker 2:But you know, you look at people on tv like that are in phenomenal shape, like even randy ordon and people aj styles. They're in their 40s and they're in probably better shape than they've ever been. And, yes, they're taking stuff, but they're still having to graft their ass off. But I moved to manchester recently and I lived in a one-bed studio apartment okay, for three months and until yesterday I can honestly say and I'm disappointed, I made a story about it last time on instagram my eating has not been what it should be, my nutrition has not been as good as it should be, and I'm disappointed in myself because I'm usually a very regimented and like disciplined person and I know that my food is what's going to help me look good.
Speaker 2:But mentally I was this one bed studio like. It was nice, but it was so claustrophobic like I used to be able to sit naked on my bed and cook my eggs and just start my balls while I was waiting for them to get frothy. Do you know what I mean? That's what I'm talking about. That's how cramped it was. I was not expecting that I get it.
Speaker 2:Tiny apartment it's a small apartment, okay and to the door at the same time, while all that's happening, Well, I've actually had to get people to come down and tan my back before a wrestling show and I'm stood in the get used to it.
Speaker 1:I like the idea of this being a stranger, someone just leaving the house to go shopping. Can you just, can you just tell me back?
Speaker 2:yeah, no, but um, there is a lot more pressure. Like I was getting in my own head, I wasn't happy, my energy was low. I knew I wasn't like I'm. You know me like, I've usually got good energy, I'm usually jacked a lot, I'm cracking jokes. I wasn't that person for a couple months there and it was because I knew there was something off of me. I knew I wasn't looking how I should. And people say like you're asking me is there pressure? There is, but I like that pressure. I like to hold myself to a high standard. I want that. Not everybody wants that. Not everybody wants to be in ship and that's absolutely fine. But I always say, like with pt clients as a personal trainer don't come to me and complain about how you look or how you're depressed. You're about how your parents. If you're not willing to do something about it, yeah, what you know, what you aren't changing, you're choosing if you if you really don't like what you see in the mirror, there are solutions.
Speaker 2:And again it comes back to that hard work and instant gratification. If I say to someone, look, you can be in the best ship of your life, but it might take you two years. Someone's going to go most people two years. You know it's not worth it. I can't. I can't commit to that. People want it in 12 weeks and then they're going to go down a route of going on some fab diet which, yes, they might lose a lot of weight, but are they going to be able to sustain that for the rest of their life?
Speaker 1:absolutely not.
Speaker 2:And then they're just going to yo-yo diet, whereas with me as a pt, I'm like okay, let me look at what you're eating now. What could we change? How can I like help you implement positive, good changes to your diet so it's not such a shock to your body?
Speaker 2:so that over time you're, it's like Atomic Habits, that book. You've got to make small little habits become your new routine. But again, it's just a gratification, it's just people want it overnight. Or, you know, we sign up oh, can you just tell me what to eat? You know they expect me as a trainer to literally say you're going to eat this, this and I can do it. But it just shows me again the laziness, like you should want to educate, because we're all different, our bodies adapt to different things. But I know I'm going off topic, but yes, there is pressure and I, you know.
Speaker 2:Now I've moved to a new apartment. I meal prep. Today I woke up with a different energy. Today I've got room in my kitchen. I can actually dance naked. Now I'm not just sat naked, I can dance naked and I start my day, you know, cooking my meals and like my vibe is back. So I've even said to myself what my peak. But for a couple of months there I was in a darker place. I was happy. I moved to manchester, opportunities were coming, but I knew I wasn't being the man that I should be living up like being the athlete that I know I want to be. And obviously, as you get older, your metabolism slows down. I don't have the quick metabolism as as I used to when I was in my early 20s, so it's on me now to be more restricted, be more regiment with maiden, and I'll be back to. You know, big flex will be back to version 2.0 in about two months time, would you say so?
Speaker 1:yeah, I like the commitment to put a date on it as well. Two months, two weeks boom, do you know what talking about? Uh, steroids, and? And well, go back to, like, the training routines that you just mentioned there. You did two cycles that have test. Well, I'm gonna say that, because you said you used test twice, the cycles aren't they? You've not just, you've not just used it twice, and then that's it no, I've gone cold turkey, which that's another thing.
Speaker 2:I'll be vulnerable. Okay, it definitely has affected my probably libido and sex drive if I'm honest yeah, because I've gone from taking test and then just coming off it and not taking anything. And that's due to my own ignorance, not wanting to educate myself enough. Like I'm talking about food, I didn't really know enough about steroids. Yeah I thought, oh, let's just jump on a little bit of test, make some gains, come off it. But you've got to kind of come off it and do a post cycle well, that's it, so it is a cycle.
Speaker 1:I mean because the way you said it, have you taken tests twice. That's like me saying I've taken cocaine twice. That just mean like two lines I've taken cocaine once on a night out, took it another night out. When you, when we say you've taken tests twice, that's over a period of like eight weeks, yeah, eight to 12 weeks twice in my life.
Speaker 2:So you know I credit myself for looking how I look, because I haven't really taken that much Compared to how much steroids some people take.
Speaker 1:Some people coast on tests all year round, I guess this is the thing to talk about, then, because I've known people who have done cycles and I always say, when it comes comes to steroids, it gets a lot of negativity, but there's a difference between using and abusing steroids. Yeah, if you do a 8 to 12 week cycle on steroids and then you do a post-cycle therapy and you don't touch them again for x amount of time, that's using using a steroid, that is using a performance enhancing drug. If you're someone like and I had a friend who was like this before I said how long, when does your cycle finish? He was like it doesn't and he's just injection once a week. It never finishes. Tablets every day, just constant and no post cycle therapy, as we're talking about there. Talk to me about the difference between a little bit more about than then, about the cycle and your experiences of the difference of using something and abusing something.
Speaker 2:Like abusing is. You know, guys, I think, for example, they're going to have beef with the lads. They want to look shredded at the beach club because they think, again, girls are going to care that you've got a six pack and you're shredded. And what I've learned is I've got older Girls really don't care if you've got a six-pack, you're not gonna, you know, pull women, whereas these guys think, oh, I've got to look, you know, I mean, and like, yes, I've been there.
Speaker 2:But as you get older, you kind of mature and realize, like what's important, but that would be abusing it.
Speaker 2:For for me is like someone that kind of just thinks, uh, I'll just jump on it for a few weeks, try and get a quick hit and insta gratification, and then doesn't do the safe stuff after.
Speaker 2:Someone that you know does it right would sit down with someone probably more experienced than them, even a doctor, maybe you would go and get your blood works done by a doctor.
Speaker 2:You would see where your test levels are sitting. Naturally, if you're lucky to be in the high range, then you probably don't need that much test. But then they can maybe speak to you and say, look, if you're going to do this it's on you, but maybe you only need to take this much and realize that you probably need to be a bit higher, which before love island, they did my test and I was kind of just about average. So it tell me that if I was going to go back on stuff, I would want to go to a doctor, get it done again and you know, get it prescribed, get it done by someone that actually knows what you're talking about, and then I would educate myself on what steroids I'm going to put into my body, because you can get a 30 quid bottle of test from some fella down the gym who doesn't care about you or whether you you know it affects your life going forward.
Speaker 2:He's just making a quick bit of money. So and that could be anything, it could be olive oil that you're just injecting, it could be, you don't know where that's coming from. So I would also do your research on what you know, what goals you want, because some steroids, you know, help you put on size, some steroids help you put on strength, some steroids help you strip fat, get you leaner, like what? What is it you're trying to achieve? Do your education. Don't just think that, oh, my mate, my mate got in great shape, taking tests and stuff, so I'll bounce on it.
Speaker 2:You're different to that person, like your, your chemical, you know, build up is different. So I would really try and educate yourself and then again, just look yourself long and hard and think you know, do I really need this? Like, do you really need steroids? Because, like I said before, there's some guys in phenomenal shape and they've never taken care in their life. So it's just kind of like, again, I can't sit here, the here, the whole love. I can never sit here and judge someone because I've done it before, but just try and figure out why you're doing it.
Speaker 2:You know if you're just looking for, if you're going to abuse it, then you know what comes with. That is the health risk and you've got to weigh it up. Every thing we do in life, every action, has a consequence, positive or negative. So if lifetime of regrets because of side effect, your hair might start thinning, the acne you might get.
Speaker 2:You know. You might be on test for eight weeks and get a really good shape. But what about the acne you might develop? That could stay with you for the rest of your life that's on you, so was it worth it? For eight weeks, looking good at a pool club for a week's holiday and maybe getting two or three shags, if you can even get it up. After everything, you're putting up your nose and everything you're drinking, do you mean? It's like you've got to weigh up what's?
Speaker 1:sad question there. Do they drug test for love island? Was that something you went through?
Speaker 2:um, yeah, is it? So? That's the thing, like I, because I haven't taken steroids now since that time. Do you remember when I had blonde hair? Yeah, that's when I was back on test and there's photos made more bad and you can tell like I'm a bit bigger, I'm a bit leaner now. I was eating good out there. I had a tan, like like all these little things going, and obviously social media.
Speaker 2:You can edit your pictures, you can make yourself look a little bit better, I mean, like all these things going, but I wasn't taking anything. So, yes, they do drug test you and they actually are a lot more focused on the mental health side of things now as well. I had to sit and have a two-hour conversation with, like a psychiatrist would that be two? Hours.
Speaker 2:She asked me so many questions psychologist, psychologist, yeah she was like adam, you know you've done this before. You know the pressures, you know the public, how they're going to become. Are you sure you're ready to kind of get yourself back into that? And I was obviously. I was like yeah, like fair enough, let's do it. But there was. It feels like there was a lot more um attention on that before you go on the show this time and I was gonna say did that have not happened the first time?
Speaker 2:um we were. We were told like, look, there's going to be a mental health person on site If you feel it if at any time you're feeling down, you need to talk to someone. You can go talk to this woman. But this time it was like before you even got casted, it was speak to this person. You had to.
Speaker 1:That's interesting because obviously there has been. Love Island has received a lot of negative criticism after Caroline Flack's suicide and suicide, and there was a fee from my series, exactly, yeah, so, and I think there's enough. Was a mic, yeah, you know again calling them muggy mike and stuff. Yeah, yeah, so, and and these this is all down to that pressure and going back to what you're saying about those, those girls that live in your building, that I just want to go on love island, like I think there is that misconception that you do go on and you are going to be set for life. But then how? I guess that was going to be.
Speaker 1:The question was how are they helping people, almost like after care of being on the show, because it is a big lifestyle adjustment, you know, record being recognized on the street and, and I guess that expectation of life's all going to be working out for me now, and then it doesn't. And then how do you deal with that reality? What was? Was there anything after the show for you? Did people get in touch with you afterwards? Okay, so there is, there is something there is a provision like that.
Speaker 2:Yes, and the questions you've just mentioned there, they were asked to me before this time again, and then after, honestly, I was getting texts quite a lot adam, can you please come check in with the team? Like blah blah blah, can you have a phone call and I was in a good place. So I was like guys, like I don't need this, like if I'm honest, I was just like I'm absolutely fine and obviously I didn't need it now. So it was there and I give credit to that. There was. There's a lot more. It's it's just sad that it's had to come to what it did for for a couple of people that have done the show or been involved with the show, for obviously producers to go shit. But I just think the world in general, mental health is such a bigger thing. Now you know even back in what?
Speaker 2:2016? People weren't really talking about it that much. Yeah, and you know now it's a huge thing but I also think, like you know, this might it's not controversial, but you know, if you have bad stuff going on in your life or you're not happy for your life, you can't just say, oh, I've got mental health, I think as well. You've got to also look yourself in the mirror and go what am I doing that's contributing to, maybe, my situation?
Speaker 1:do you?
Speaker 2:mean, like, if I want to get off drink, for example, and I know that all my mates meet down at the pub and I keep going down to the pub, I know that that's my hook down there. So if I'm continuing to put myself in that situation, then I can't just say, oh, but I've got mental health or I've got a drink problem. No, that that's a you problem. Like that's just my opinion yeah, I think as a human being. Our actions have consequences.
Speaker 1:Yeah, if you're putting yourself in those environments. It's something that was said the other day. You know we're talking about, um, obviously, recovery from alcoholism and addiction, and someone recently said to me like, oh, I think I want to go sit in a beer garden this year, though, just to see if I could handle it. This is someone with alcohol addiction, and someone else in the group chimed in with you know what, if you sit in a barber's long enough, you'll have a haircut, and I thought it was a really good example. If you're putting yourself in those positions, don't be shocked when the outcome is something negative. You know.
Speaker 2:I have a guy, a friend, um, that lives in the building and he's like in his late 30s and he, before I met him, he had a really bad breakup and he's been working on himself for the past four or five months. Right, got himself into a really good place, moved to manchester, new job, things were going really good. Now his ex-girlfriend started getting back in touch with him and they were meeting up a few times and then one day, honestly, this, all this is all happening. In the last week one day she rang him and said I've been sleeping with someone else and the whole time I've been kind of talking to you again and I think I like him and we're cutting this off now. So this man, grown man, was sobbing in my arms last week going I love this girl. I thought this was going to be my second chance of her. Now talk about going off the rails, bless him. I said to him you know getting back on the bottle and you know getting back in these dark thoughts is not going to help you and I can only help him so much as a friend trying to tell him what to do. But he was back on the drink.
Speaker 2:There's quite a social element to where I live, so people are always out. He's been out a lot of nights and I pulled him to the side one one night, um, a couple nights, when I said, mate, you know the way you're, the way you're living, like this is not gonna, this is not gonna go well for you. Like, you have to accept that this girl's made a decision she wants to be with someone else. I know it's not nice to hear, especially as, as a man, ego and things involved, but you need to accept it.
Speaker 2:And you're only ruining your life now, going forward with the time that you've got left through staying in this dark place and these actions and like, yeah, it's bad, like, but bad stuff happens to loads of people. It's how you. The bad stuff doesn't define you. How you react defines you, and so, to his credit, he's had a bit of a blowout. And then he came and said you know what? You're right, I need to get back on track. So I mean, yesterday I went to the food shop, he joined the gym again and I think he's now working on himself again and I said look, I'm here to support you, I will give you help.
Speaker 2:But if you're almost throwing it back on my face and ignoring everything I'm saying I will wash my hands off you at some point because I've got my own shit in my own life, that I'm like, I'm a very given person. I will try and help anyone if I see you're not listening or you're not trying to take it on board or you're not trying to take. It doesn't have to be monumental things. People put a goal on stuff. I've got to quit alcohol overnight. No, you don't. But you can make small, gradual changes that eventually will all like compile up and make a big result. So hopefully he's going to make these little small changes, which he seems to be doing.
Speaker 2:But I just worry that you know one slip up or one wrong communication with her could lead it, but he's a grown man. I can't do it for him. I said them look, mate, this is. I want you to get better. I want you to live your life and meet someone. Yeah, you need to become someone that's attractable. If you want to attract someone new in your life, you need to become attractable like dwell in your pity and your sorrow and getting on the bottle and making yourself look even worse. You're not going to attract anyone doing like that. So he's got a way up what he wants for his life absolutely.
Speaker 1:I always say this you can only help people who want to help themselves as well. I think we see that a lot in substance misuse services, people coming in and and if they're not in a position where they're willing to change, yeah, the one thing that I'll say to people is, well, don't, don't stress about it. If, then if they're not ready to change, you can't force that change on someone. It's often people have what I what I would call the light bulb moment, where they just think you know what sick of this. Now, yeah, I need to make changes, and if someone wants help, then fucking hell, we'll throw the book at them with all the help that they want, but until that point, you can't help people who don't want to help themselves.
Speaker 2:It's something I've always said you can lead a water, a horse to water. You can't force it to drink, I mean it's great saying, but also don't, like we said before, don't sit and complain about stuff, don't think, oh my life's shit. But then if you know you gotta look yourself in the mirror and take accountability as an adult and say what am I doing that's contributing to how I'm feeling? Yes, I might be going through some bad shit, but, like I said, the bad shit happens to everybody you've got to think right, okay, what could I be doing, even if it's just someone small?
Speaker 2:do you mean like people that lie in bed all day and they think, oh, life's never going to get better. Blah, even if you can just get out of bed that day, it's a win for you. And I think some people think, oh, but it's not a big win, so it's not like that could be a huge win for you, a win's a win.
Speaker 2:A win's a win. So get busy celebrating your wins. Don't compare them to anybody else, because you've got a completely different story and a completely different set of circumstances to somebody else. But as long as you're making small progress, you're still making progress. Like slow progress is better than no progress.
Speaker 1:I saw a real good quote the other day about comparison being.
Speaker 2:It's the thief of joy, joy. I love that because in this age of social media, yeah, it's all people do, yeah, and it's. I've struggled with it like don't be wrong me, you know, even for example, who hasn't?
Speaker 1:that's using social media, whether it be friends, um celebrities, you know family, whatever, seeing other people doing well, and you sat there thinking well, now do you know this age now? Or now, if you haven't achieved this and all this sort of like, even someone so simple.
Speaker 2:There's a restaurant that opened in Manchester last weekend. Tom Molly and a couple other people from Love Island were there for the opening. I didn't even get invited right and I had a moment where I was like shit, I'm left out. I was like they're all there having a good night. They're all there getting more publicity. Am I doing wrong or why am I living a certain way that's not making me attractive to be, invited to these events now and I honestly like that's I hold my hands up, and I did.
Speaker 2:I had this moment I was like, oh, but I live in man. This place is. This place is two minutes down the road from where I live, and people know I live in Manchester. Now, do you know what I? Mean, and I'm like so, if they're gonna invite it, but I didn't. What am I maybe doing wrong?
Speaker 2:and then I thought you know what? No, I'm living my life how I want to live. I don't care about the whole celebrity like lifestyle and the whole like yes, look, does it have its perks? 100%. Is it cool when you walk down the street and people are nice to you and like, hey, I loved you on the show or you're a great wrestler? 100% that is great. But, like I said before, I don't want my identity to just be oh, you're Adam from Love Island.
Speaker 2:I was on the train on the way up, sat eating my food chicken and rice from a Tupperware. This guy comes over, didn't even ask, just takes a selfie with me and goes, oh and I was just like, but that's the thing as well. I can't win. If someone asked me for a photo, I can't say no because then I'm a dickhead. Do you mean they'll switch? Oh, you're a dickhead, you love yourself, you're up yourself. You want to get a photo with someone, whereas if I'm maybe not feeling my best one day or I'm, you know, I've got a hat on I may are gonna go. Oh, met that adam guy. You know he just came from the. They probably didn't even come. No, I came from the gym, met that adam guy today, asked me for a photo. He said no, what a wanker. So those are the things where you have to weigh up as well. It's like you know anyone going on the show.
Speaker 2:What are you trying to get from the show? Are you ready for the things that do come from it? Because we spoke about it. It changes the life of some people, but it may not necessarily change yours. And if you're already unhappy with where you're at in your life and you think this TV show is going to change your life and make your life incredible, you need to be aware of the risk that it's probably not going to happen, or it might for three to six months. You might ride that little wave and people know about you and people care who you are, but you probably will go back to just Joe Blogs. I'm back working in gyms in Manchester. People look at me again and go You're from Love Island, why are you working in a gym?
Speaker 2:Like obviously, but I want to work in a gym.
Speaker 1:I've chosen to do that Because I don't get the ASOS brand Clothing deal.
Speaker 2:But even at that I wasn't expecting that either?
Speaker 1:No, even at that.
Speaker 2:I enjoy personal training. Again, I find that I want to Like. I said so I'm okay working in a gym and trying to help people, as long as I'm doing my wrestling on the side, like I'm a very easygoing person, and that's what I mean. If I was, if I was so desperate for all this fame and stuff, I'd probably have messaged that restaurant and been like, hey, I wasn't invited to this, why not?
Speaker 2:Make sure you invite me to the next one tonight. Where can I be to make sure I'm seen to be someone cool, Because I get on great with it? I could literally say hey, mate, what's on this weekend? Oh, so-and-so is going to this, this is an event. I could then message that company and say hey, I'm Adam from Love.
Speaker 1:Island, could I come along? I could if I really wanted to, and they're good, obviously the more people that do the show.
Speaker 2:They will jump at any opportunity and ice cream shops opening down the road.
Speaker 1:I'll go to the opening yeah, I mean because I want to be seen.
Speaker 2:I don't need it yeah I would love that validation in one from yourself, waking up every day, living as the person that you want to be, and also through helping people. The guy I'm work, the guy that I'm training with, I don't even seen in my story was, you know, over 20 stone we're getting him down to 18 stone. Now, if I can get him down to there and he's, you know, he's almost fully reversed his diabetes for training with me, right, that to me is validation absolutely I've made a good impact on that guy's life.
Speaker 2:He's messaged me saying adam, since I met you, my life has completely changed and I owe that to you. That, to me, is validation. That to me, has been an influence, not going like hey, I turned up at this event and yeah, and that goes to back to the term.
Speaker 1:Sometimes I've seen the comments. What is it that you were actually influencing?
Speaker 2:An influence to me is you're having a positive impact on people. Yeah, yeah, do you know what I mean? Like just because you get underwear sent out and then you post a video of you half naked in your underwear and turn around and show your ass because you unclout, you're not really an influencer, you're just. What are you influencing?
Speaker 1:Yeah, staring my butthole for 5.99.
Speaker 2:A meal deal is dearer these days. Honestly, when I go in and try and get a meal deal, 8 quid it nearly breaks my heart.
Speaker 1:Oh God, do you know what? It's funny because, in terms of the idea of all press being good press, I remember one of the things that you spoke to me about before was when you was living in Newcastle. If you was going for what's the shopping centre there? The Metro, yeah, if one of you is going for the Metro, if some, like a group of girls, stopped you and said, oh Adam from Love Island, can we get a picture? You would feel that like ugh. But then if, like, there was a mum with a child and wanted to talk to you about wrestling, you could, you said you'd stand and talk to them. You know you can't help what you're being recognised for, but you will engage with people more when they talk to you about your wrestling career as opposed to when they talk to you about Love Island, like it's on me.
Speaker 2:I went on the TV show the biggest. Tv show in the world. One of them potentially twice it's on me. People are I can't look and go. Oh, I hate this. I wish I could go back.
Speaker 1:I made the decision that I'm going to was for a reason which we've discussed, so I'm a lot more open to it now.
Speaker 2:Like when people do ask me for photos, I'm like yeah, sure. Like I have a chat with them where you from blah blah as well. Back in the day, the first time I'd met a girl who really hated the whole kind of publicity. So out of respect for her, I was almost like, ah guys, no, I don't want a photo, because she was there with me most of the time. Girls used to brush past her and go, adam, can we? And then it was disrespecting her if I didn't kind of say hey you know that's my girlfriend.
Speaker 2:You're kind of, do you mean? So? That's why I kind of went into myself and thought you know what, the less attention I get to me, whereas now I'm like I'm single and like people obviously like me enough that they want a photo with me, whether it's just to go. I met someone from love island cool, but some people actually go. I really enjoyed you in the show, thought you're really funny, thought you're really like mature this time, like jumping.
Speaker 1:So yeah, that's a comment that I did hear a lot about you because, weirdly enough, like I, I did have a couple years where, I think, ironically, I started watching. I think it was the year after you'd been in it. But um, it's just, I'm not gonna lie, it's the same shit every year now, isn't it? It has a formula, doesn't it? I stopped watching a couple years ago and I didn't watch your series, which you know. A few of my friends was like are you watching him in there? I was like, well, no, because one of two things I said I won't like it if I feel like they're.
Speaker 1:I said at the end of the day, they're in there for 24 hours a day. It's an hour's tv show. They get a very small amount of time on there. I said if they start pushing him as being a dick or a cock, and because they, they can influence the story you know I mean by what they show I thought it's just gonna piss me off. So I thought I chose. I chose not to watch it. But one of the things I did hear from people was watching. It was like because I said I'm just worried that they make him out to be a dick. Because I was like no, actually he comes across as really mature that was the word that a lot of people use and in comparison to not criticizing obviously there's some, probably some of your friends, but not criticizing the other people in there, but that was what was described.
Speaker 1:There was a massive uh difference in maturity between yourself and there were people in there but I think that goes back down to the reasons they were in there and the reason that you was in there.
Speaker 2:There's that being a factor, I think there's a lot like and I've I've said this on a podcast recently like I have been the fuck boy, I've been the jack the lad in marbella, not really caring about people's feelings, doing what I want to do with no repercussions, and I think a lot of guys almost like British culture as well. Like you watch the in-betweeners and things growing up, it's like it's just, it's just what lads do you cheat on your girlfriend and you get sex whenever you can and it's on your mind all the time and it's a young boys mentality. I've got to a stage now where I'm older. It's like right, okay, what do I want to be working on?
Speaker 2:what sort of a man am I wanting to? You know, leave the house as every day. What sort of values and morals, what influence do I want to have on people? How do I want to help people? That's where I'm at now a lot of guys that are still in their early 20s and stuff that still go on the show, like I was probably one of the older ones.
Speaker 2:This time you know they are still in that stage and again, I can't judge because I've been that guy, so I get it they just happen to be on tv and again, you've got the younger generation watching, watching it, so they think that's what's funny or that's what's cool. A lot of guys watching it like probably think I'm boring, or probably think I'm a drip, as they call it, because I'm probably a bit more chill. Now I want to talk about deeper stuff. I don't you know, I want to sit down with people and have a conversation. Okay, you're really successful. How did you get there? Or you've overcome this dark time in your life. How did you do that? These are the conversations I want to have.
Speaker 1:That's. That's why I do this podcast. I love having these conversations. I'm off to Marbella again this year to get fucked up and I step up to all these girls.
Speaker 2:I've been there done it and, like I also think men have to have to have that stage in their life don't get me wrong to get it out of their system. But it is a young man's game. But it's a young man's game and it's a young man's, it's a young generation's TV, bringing families closer together. Like cool, fair enough, a lot of people sitting there watching together. But it's just what is getting portrayed from the show Like that's how you know how you have to look to be seen as attractive, or this is the sort of person you've got to come across to make you seem attractive.
Speaker 2:You've got to kind of be the cool fuck boy that you know is going to make girls chase you then Because then you go out and you think that that's how you got to be and you just end up hurting people along the way.
Speaker 2:And I think as you get older you start figuring out really who you are. I would say it's only since I turned 30 and I looked myself in the mirror for some things in a last relationship that I had and I did some things that I'm not proud of. That I looked at myself in the mirror and said you know what, as a man, I want to step up and be this way now. That just comes with age. You're 18, 19 years old, like live your life, have fun, make your mistakes, but just know that as an older person trying to tell you, you know you've got to take accountability for your actions and you will get hurt along the way, and life isn't all about social media and how good you look I just want to go back to the steroid use and and based on your experiences, because one of the things that I have heard for for years now is roid rage yeah where does roid rage come from?
Speaker 1:is it real? What's your opinion on on?
Speaker 2:roid rage, like it is real. But for me personally, I think you have to be quite a naturally aggressive or short-tempered person anyway for it really to jim mean like to really be like magnified like. I'm a very chill guy so when I was taking tests there was no difference really in me like I got stronger in the gym. I was probably more motivated in the gym because I knew I was taking stuff, so I was like I want to get the best from this. But I know it definitely like didn't affect how I was. I wasn't sna aggressive. It's not in me really to be a naturally aggressive person. That's why I've struggled with wrestling. You know people saying, yeah, like you're really good, but I need more grit I need more aggression I'm not naturally an aggressive person.
Speaker 2:I'm very chill, like if you've got a problem with me. I'm like cool mate, I don't give a shit like fuck, you like do you mean, I'm not again looking for confrontation.
Speaker 1:I'm very like you know me. I'm such a and that was evidenced on on love island I you'd done, which was considered to be what he's like you're a snake tom. Yeah, yeah, that was it.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and I was like you look like you didn't give a shit. Yeah, I was like you're just looking like a bigger dickhead than me that you're actually asking about this.
Speaker 2:We're on a dating show. I've taken your bird on a date and you're cracking up about it like this is what you signed up for. Stop being a fucking stress on your life or certain things that do get to you. I think if you do take, you know, steroids that probably can impact that and can enhance that, and I think then it's not an excuse either to kind of be, oh well, you know I'm on test so I've punched a hole in my wall because I'm pissed off. It's like. No, like you know, just look at yourself, sort your shit out what is going on in your life that you can try and do to reduce that stress. But it is, it is a real thing, definitely, I would say I think you could.
Speaker 1:What you're saying there, though, that that could be attributed to any substance I think you know we talk about like alcohol as well. You know some people can be really aggressive drunks and some people can be really chilled out drunks. I think it's you know, whether there's the science behind it or not. I think all these substances really do is amplify how we're feeling already, and I think, as you've said, then, with steroid use, if you're someone that is easily irritated, then you're just going to be irritated more when you're, you know, when you're on steroids, and surely that's the same for any substance, not even like, maybe even just in the moment do you mean, you could have a really like person that you know is a nice person.
Speaker 2:They could be going through some shit, they could get on the drink one night and they could just do something that isn't like them.
Speaker 1:Or you hear something, you go what You're like them Like nah couldn't be right.
Speaker 2:You've got the wrong person. But whatever they're going through, whatever substance they've taken, I think, yeah, like steroids. That's why I say you've got to think long and hard about whether you really one need them. And two, the side effects, because you know you want to be a bodybuilder or look great. Might be great for you, but what effect could you potentially be having on your partner? Yeah, your kids. The environment they are around. They see you snapping and losing your shit. Do your kids get anxious of being around?
Speaker 1:daddy now do you know daddy's aggressive anything kids.
Speaker 2:Kids don't understand that you're jamming you're jabbing your fucking your arse like a tea bag. Yeah, I mean, just because you want to have big arms. And do you mean they're just saying, oh daddy was aggressive, or do you mean? So these are the things. Again that accountability is one of my favorite words. You have to take accountability for your actions and not just go oh well, I'm on the gear, so that's why I'm more aggressive. And you know, in eight weeks it won't be like this. Like, no, like, own your shit, stop being jumping, stop looking for things to blame yeah you've taken stuff, know that there's more.
Speaker 2:There's probably more responsibility on you then. Yeah, because especially if you know that you're a bit of an aggressive person, it's on you to keep yourself in check one of the things I like to hear when it comes to similar to what we're talking about here is um.
Speaker 1:It explains, but it doesn't excuse, and I think that's a really good example when we're talking about things like roid rage, when we are talking about people under the influence of alcohol acting out. It explains the behavior, it doesn't excuse the behavior, and I think that's something that rings true with with anything. Um, we talked a little bit about um post-cycle therapy for steroid use. What? What does post-cycle therapy look like? What is it? How do you do it? I mean, you've said about 8 to 12 weeks. On the actual gear itself, what does an actual post-psychotherapy look like?
Speaker 2:so this is the thing like I, you didn't do it well. One I just went cold turkey, okay, and so I just came off and didn't take stuff. I knew there was stuff that I probably should have taken to like help get my balance, like my hormone levels so for me, I mean vaguely back in the day I know it was called like tamoxifen.
Speaker 2:Okay, is what I was, um, not not prescribed, but like people were advising me to take once you've done your test. Whatever, jump on this tamoxifen, what does it do? It'll try and bring your hormone levels kind of back to jimmy. But again, as a younger kid at the time I was what like 19 when my mates were on it I was like I don't really have enough for 30 quid to take a tablet that's gonna I mean so I was like I'll just not take it, do you mean?
Speaker 2:so I probably have had to. I've probably dealt with it as I've got older because it has probably had an effect on my chemical build-up. But, like, like I said before, I I'm in good shape now, not taking steroids. I know, with or without test or steroids, that I was taking or I'm taking, I will still look good. Yeah, it was more just like where am I? Where am I in life? Am I trying to get somewhere to the next level and do, like that's what I'm saying. Like I still want to make it big in wrestling, I still want to do things and I am tempted again like I'll never say never, I've done it twice.
Speaker 2:I will never sit here now and go, I'll never take stuff again. I might get back on stuff again to kind of like I said I'm going to sort my nutrition out after the couple months I've had in Manchester, I'm going to train my ass off. Then I'm going to look at myself and go, okay, do I need to? And that's that's my choice. But it's also on me to sit long and hard and think, okay, I'm looking great, but could I get to that next level by taking something because it does help yeah it does, but it's just not relying on it.
Speaker 2:Train your ass. Like I said before, train your ass off, get that place where you've made really good progress. Naturally, you've been training your ass off. You know that. You've left no stone unturned. You've been working your ass off in the gym, you've been training, you've been getting your nutrition, you've been getting the meals and, especially, you want to get big. You got to eat big. That's the thing. People don't want to eat the amount of food sometimes that you have to eat and also calorie intake, and some people don't?
Speaker 2:some people don't want to diet the way they have to. There's an injection you can take now and people are losing crazy weight through this injection and I'm like but one. That just shows me that you don't have the discipline. Two, you're just looking for the quick fix again.
Speaker 1:You just want to take an injection which is not gonna be long term sustainable. Long term, because what are you gonna do?
Speaker 2:you're gonna inject yourself for the rest of your life? Probably not. So you're just gonna go back to whereas if you could just find your goal, break it down into small little habits. Look at your daily routine. What are you doing wrong? What's kind of sabotaging? Where you want to be and just start working on that, you're going to build. You're going to be more proud of yourself anyway in the long run because you're going to do. You know what? I did that myself. Like, do you mean like? And I had got to a stage, especially for the past few years, where I was training my ass off, naturally I was training my legs, I was pushing myself, I was making good progress.
Speaker 2:And then I had kind of an audition for Gladiators coming up and stuff and I thought you know what, maybe if I jump on someone again it'll maybe get me that next level.
Speaker 1:But it's just not an excuse. I still can't. Just on the topic of Gladiators I still can't believe it wasn't picked up for that, because Gladiators for me, especially going back in the 90s, was very much you know, professional wrestling that most people know with with the original world of sport and stuff. But it was the big characters there was jacked like you on paper. When you told me you was going for that I was like oh, adam's gonna be a gladiator. I was like there is not a chance that they wouldn't use you. What happened? How come it didn't come to?
Speaker 2:so I had I had the audition. I went down to london, yeah, and this audition was tough.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I heard it was what.
Speaker 2:You came into a room, you had to do as many pull-ups as you could in a minute. You had to dead hang from a bar for as long as you could until you dropped, while the whole casting team stood watching with clipboards and the whole, your peers, your people, you're against. You had to do burpee sideways, burpee box jump, burpee box jump for three minutes without stopping, without losing your, because you had to show that you could. And then we had to go out and do. We had to hold this big, heavy, like medicine ball for like as long as we could and then drop it and drive a prowler with like 200 kg up the strip.
Speaker 2:We had to do a vertical jump test to see how much you could jump like from standing still boom. We had to rope, climb up a rope and tap the top as many times we could in five minutes. Then we went upstairs, we had to put a gum shield in and a helmet and we had to like wrestle each other off a mat, try and, like you know, bang each other off. Then we had to do a 500 meter row and then jump straight off and do this mad sprint thing. And then there was another one where you had to start somewhere run, come back and touch, do a burpee, come back and talk like it was physically demanding, and this is this is all back to back this isn't like we're going to do one and then, in an hour's time, we'll do the next.
Speaker 2:This was all like drumming and you've got your ears.
Speaker 1:Was this sort of routine designed by someone with a clipboard who had no idea what that?
Speaker 2:no, it was the actual people there were there, you tell, these guys were like high, high tech coaches we were down in like somewhere in london like it was a proper sports facility, like it was like high class and there's a lot of like jack people there and influencers and people that look great. And I ended up chatting to this guy that's actually one of the gladiators and he, he saw me smash and he's like mate, he's like you smashed. That he was like I'd be very surprised if you and I even said to him, you as well, because he did, and obviously he got it. Now, what I'm gonna say, I think I didn't get it because I've done Love Island.
Speaker 1:Okay, yeah.
Speaker 2:Because, let's say, I got casted. I would have got more attention, I think, than the rest of the people it would have been.
Speaker 1:Love Island star is now a gladiator, and it's not about Claudia, as it becomes about something else. They didn't care.
Speaker 2:I think they wanted a fresh cast of athletes that would just they could make their own stars.
Speaker 1:Well, you should have said that before, because there is no reason why I didn't get it. You know there's not.
Speaker 2:I even had to go in on camera, take my top off and speak like a promo and some of them were like oh, I bottled that or I seized up. I've done that with wrestling for six, seven years now in Sicily. Put a camera on. I'll do a promo now. Do you know what I mean it's like? So I knew I'd done really well. Weird place, because I remember I knew I was going. I felt like I was going to get it. I went to marbella.
Speaker 1:I was I'm going to talk about tan for a week, train hard and kind of what happened the first time he's gone to my like coming home for we and stuff, literally, literally the same kind of thing happened.
Speaker 2:Went to spain was like I'll train here for a week, I'll get in good shape, and then I'll probably get an email saying I need to come to london or whatever and start recording gliders while I was in marbella. Hey, adam, hope all is good. Just messaging to say that you haven't got gladiators. And you know, take care, if you do want to be kept in mind for future opportunities, let us know and.
Speaker 2:I just remember sitting there in the sun going like again you think you're like ready for something and someone's going to change your life, or someone's going to and do you know what I mean?
Speaker 2:and then that's when the self-doubt comes in and people you know I'm a confident guy people probably think, adam, you know you like insecurities, like self-doubt, procrastination surely not you're this big, confident guy like anytime you you say you've got good energy. But I have even had like, and again, I don't. I don't know. I don't want to say that I've had mental health, because I know there's a lot of people that suffer a lot more traumatic things in their life than I have.
Speaker 2:But I've definitely had moments as a grown man where I've sat there and gone what am I doing, like? What is my life meant to be? What is my purpose? I've always tried to be purpose driven. I've always knew that I'm meant to be doing something. And it's probably more embarrassment that, like I know I'm not living up to my full potential and I don't know why that is. And even even recently, like even moving to manchester, like I've been working on a few things and you know stuff hasn't happened and but I think you just like learned to accept it, like you just gotta keep going yeah, and I think sometimes you know things can't be explained.
Speaker 1:No, no, like I mean, it's okay that you can try and explain yourself. You can give that rationale, because this sort, if I remember correctly as well, this gladiators audition was before you did all stars as well, wasn't it?
Speaker 2:uh. Yes, yeah so I'd done the audition. Then I was in Marbella and I was thinking I got offered a job in Spain again and I said guys, I can't take that, I'm probably going to get this gladiator thing. So then, when I was there, I ended up staying in Spain.
Speaker 2:I was like guys actually change the plan, I'll stay for the summer, the. And again I was at a stage of like, well, fuck it, do I go back to the UK in the rain and be miserable, kind of thinking, oh, I'll never set back, or do I stay in the sun? I know people around me and we'll see what happens. And then I obviously got the All-Stars thing.
Speaker 1:But you know, I just think life's always going to throw shit at you. Do you think there may be, because obviously it was all ITV? Do you think there Maybe Hadhramand for the Love Island All Stars, and that's why they didn't give it to Gladiators.
Speaker 2:I mean, I don't know how connected it all is Because Gladiators was BBC, was it not? I'm sure it was a different channel. Oh really, I think Gladiators was on BBC.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I don't know, I know it. I wish people like when you said if we keep your mind for future opportunities. Just fucking tell me. Do you know what I mean? Just fucking be honest and say we don't want you, we don't need you whatever, and I think that'd be an easier pill to swallow than this whole. Oh, but we'll keep you in mind for the like it keeps hope in someone.
Speaker 2:It does. Yeah, someone goes. You know what? Yeah, I can still make it, something can still happen. Like you say, like I would rather WB. Someone call me now and go. Adam, you're probably like you're not, you're not going to make it you're 32 now. Yes, you're in good shape, but it's not going to happen for you. I could at least then go I got close, that chapter's done and I can and channel it into something else more positive, whereas still the kid inside of me is like I know I could still make it.
Speaker 2:I could get another try, I could get brought to Glasgow to be a security guard and they can see how I look on TV and go. That's a guy's a star.
Speaker 2:Like there's still little things inside of me and that's why I put myself through physical pain every day to train, because one it's like a chip on my shoulder, like I have this moment of like, doing these high intensity head classes when I can hardly breathe, and I'm doing these burpees and like it comes into my head and I'm like I'll show you. It's almost like a I wasn't, I wasn't good enough, you, I wasn't, I wasn't you.
Speaker 2:when I know I am, I know if I was there I would have became something yeah or if I'd been brought to america, they would have molded me into something like I just that's not an arrogant thing, I just back myself, back to yourself, like I'm not a bad looking fella.
Speaker 2:I've worked hard to get in shape and you know I can go in the ring like. Am I going to be a flipping Will Ospreay doing a five star crazy? Probably not. I could do it, but probably not to their level. I know my lane, I know where I am. You put me on Ross Smackdown to go out and be that sort of where kids and families love me, I'm one of the big ones.
Speaker 1:There's also AEW, which is a big promotion in America, almost the competitor of WWE in some regard. Has there ever, because we've got friends in AEW has there ever been anything about AEW that's been mentioned for you?
Speaker 2:I don't think so, and again I'm one. I want to get there on my own merit. I don't really want to drop the message. Hey, Kip, could you? Give someone a nudge. Can I send you a few matches? I just I don't want to be that guy, and I'm not saying there's anything wrong with that If that gets you to where you want to be, but I would rather someone go. This Max said guy, yeah, we want him. At least I know I'm there because Like, oh, could you do me a favour?
Speaker 1:Yeah, but also in the same breath. You know, there's so many people who are.
Speaker 2:I could be wrong. Like I know, nathan speaks to. Obviously, dan.
Speaker 1:There's so many people doing all that, I don't think it'd hurt to just get help from people. I think that's one of the things that we sometimes do as men is that we feel like we've just got to do shit on our own. I think women as well. You know, sometimes it's just the mentality of you know, island mentality, I call it. You're born alone, you die alone so I think like why don't we reach out to people for support when there are people that could support and help us?
Speaker 2:we just don't do it yeah, and I'm like I'm not talking about that, but I think in general life 100, I will ask someone for help yeah like there's been guys in the building that I live in and I've maybe been having a bit of a shitty day and I've been like, hey, man, let's have a chat. Yeah, I'll sit and have a chat with them, just say, and then they'll open up about stuff.
Speaker 2:And I think, as men, this world, we think if we talk about stuff we're going to be seen as weak yeah or people are going to judge us, or our partner isn't going to think that we're the man they fell in love with or our friends are maybe, you know, going to take the piss out of us because we say, like I did a speech the other day about, you know, men losing their hair and stuff and balding and things and how insecurities come from that and stuff, and like people are probably laughing me, going like why are you up talking about bald men? Look at your hair.
Speaker 2:You've got a great hairline 32, but it was more like as he takes the cap off, but it was more just like the insecurities that come and as men we keep everything in we don't feel like we can talk about it when you're still a human at the end of the day you still have moments of self-doubt, insecurities, moments when you look in the mirror and you're frustrated, you're pissed off and keeping all that in. It's like shaking a fizzy drink and the pressure building and eventually we smirked because I did that hand action.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, yeah, and we were probably thinking of some of those, but the pressure could build and you could end up going and doing something drastic one day or just not waking up and being the sort of person that you know that you should be and that affects everybody around you. When you're not at your best, you affect everybody else around you, but, as that's a message you get across, ask for help if you need help on something, even if it's work or a project, and you need like I think, is it. Is it an ego thing that people oh, I can't like just ask them for help? If I was starting a business and I knew I was really good at one thing but I couldn't do everything, I'd bring someone in to help me to get better. But in general life we think, oh, we can't do that.
Speaker 2:A lot of people are going through the same shit you're going through. A lot of people can actually relate to the stuff that you're going through right now. If you actually ask for help or opened up a bit more, you'd actually realize that you're not alone in what you're going through. Yeah, other people are suffering, probably at the same time with you, or have suffered and have overcome it, and that's how, so you can learn something from it, yeah, and then when you do, you can then help the next person Absolutely. You're qualified, then, to help someone. If you were like a drug addict alcoholism if you can get yourself off that, you can now use that to try and help other people, and I think that's again just ask for help, like I'm not saying I say this all the time, I'm not saying sit at to this like if you're going through, I feel like you have your time to feel what you need to feel.
Speaker 2:You're only human 100. But then there is a time when you've got to look yourself in the mirror and say, right, I need to sort my shit out, I need to do something about it, otherwise don't come and complain, because I don't want to hear it. You know, I mean and that sounds harsh but it's on you to take the reins of your own life and take control. You, like you said before, only you can help yourself. You can ask people for help, but ultimately it comes down to you doing it.
Speaker 1:Talking about alcoholism, drug addiction and even, as we've said, then there are people with steroids that are constantly on them. What are your thoughts on that stigma associated with steroid addiction and how can we as a society work to reduce in that stigma?
Speaker 2:Stigma. In what sense?
Speaker 1:Just the the, I guess. Well, trying to find a way to explain it, it's hard. Stigma is stigma. Robbie, help me out here with this one so the thoughts on the stigma with steroid addiction and how can society work towards reducing it. Well, I mean ultimately, adam's done an extraordinary job of explaining that just by talking about what it is.
Speaker 2:Do you feel like we've hit that point?
Speaker 1:I think he's done that by accident, without actually Fair.
Speaker 2:Do you know what you probably have to be?
Speaker 1:fair. I think he's probably done a better job of me talking about that than having to.
Speaker 2:Then we can put it into a question yeah.
Speaker 2:I like that one. Steroids is. A lot of guys especially take steroids and they walk around the big, masculine, you know, strong guy in the gym, the big guy in the gym. They're usually the people with the most insecurities yeah, the most like self-image problems or they're like really insecure in certain ways, so they think they're having to become this bigger person. Like very similar to my story I felt vulnerable and insecure of how small I was because I got beat up. I didn't want to have that anymore. So I got myself big and, yes, I took steroids to help get me big. So, you know, although people in the gym that are clanging and banging weights and making noise and they walk in and you're like, oh, you're the big lad, they're usually the people that are suffering the most and they're usually the people that are in their own head the most, which is why they get hooked on on steroids. They think then, because they've made a bit of progress taking it, I need to stay on it the rest of my life.
Speaker 2:I'm hooked on it and that's when it's sad because they just are jabbing and jabbing and jabbing and probably get the mindset of nothing is enough. They've probably got to a dosage and then thought, okay, well, that's probably not working anymore, so I need to take more and more and more and the addiction grows and grows and grows and so I feel like, know, if you're in the gym, I actually feel like you know, not feel sorry for them, but just think twice before you judge, because they're probably have suffered with something or they're going through something which has made them feel like they have to take all this gear. Especially if there's a sort of person that's just doing it because they want to be a big lad or they want to be big in a pub. If they're a serious bodybuilder and they're competing and this is their life and this is what they want to do, then it's like crack on, mate, like because you will only make it big in bodybuilding and win shows if you're taking stuff like it's a sad trip.
Speaker 2:Chris Bumstead you know Chris Bumstead, no, like he's, he's a classic physique winner. I think four times now, I think four or five. Lovely guy, real chilled, like he's probably stinger now back in the day, but he is full of stuff and even he talks about like the downside of it and things. But you know he's had a kid recently and he's probably thinking about wrapping up his bodybuilding. But he would never have become that guy without taking steroids yeah, so for him.
Speaker 2:He's taken them. He's also. He had great genetics initially it was how can I like amplify my genetics to become? And he's made a life for himself. He wins half a million every time. He wins that show. He's got his missus, he's got his kid. Now he's made a great life for himself. I'm about taking steroids. That wouldn't have happened, do you mean?
Speaker 2:yeah, so I think again, it's like coming back to weighing up okay, am I one to take a serious career in bodybuilding? Am I going to make money from it? And if not, it's that's. That's when it's on you to kind of think well, am I okay with the side effects and the risks of just getting on stage once or twice a year in my little pants and have another man judge whether I've got a nicer body than the guy beside me? That's when you've got a. Really. Is it worth anxiety, is it worth you losing your temper? And also a lot of people that date bodybuilders.
Speaker 2:The relationship doesn't last. It's a very selfish sport. Everything is about you every time, from the moment you wake up to the moment you go to sleep. It building lifestyle. Every meal is on point. You're weighing out your food. Your partner wants to, who, maybe he's not into bodybuilding or fitness wants to go out for a dinner sometime? No, I can't go. I can't go, or you'll go, but you'll sit and eat chicken, rice and broccoli or chopperware. So it's again. It's like you've got a way up all your.
Speaker 1:The way the lifestyle you're choosing to live will have an impact on other people around you and it's up to you to decide whether it's worth it or not I think, going back to going back wrestling, do you know that there was a time in the in the 80s where we think of hulk hogan, we think of ultimate warrior, we think of those guys. That was just incredibly jacked. And then we look at the professional wrestlers that are on this, I guess on the british scene today, but even over in america they're half the size of what we used to see in the 80s. But I still think there was a pressure for young lads. I mean I I started when I was 15 I'm very I'm a skinny lad now think there was a pressure for young lads.
Speaker 1:I mean I started when I was 15. I'm a skinny lad now, but I was a skinny, skinny kid then and the pressure that you'd feel looking at the lads in the changing rooms and especially, I mean if I was in a changing room with you when I was 15, I'd be like fuck, what have I got to do to look like this guy? I guess how can individuals, basically in wrestling, in sports industries, create that healthy environment to prevent people feeling like they need to take steroids? Is there anything that can be done?
Speaker 2:I think like, yes, like steroids aren't the answer. Like I said before, you can get in good shape without taking gear. That's when I would probably hire a coach, someone that's really advanced in muscle building. If your goal is put on muscle, yeah, get a coach who's like training people to put on muscle. Do you mean so? Like miles, for example? Miles has made. If you remember the kid that we yeah, when he was reffing, look at how he's then so that miles isn't taking anything, but he's yes, he's getting older, but he's also grinding his ass off that kid's training every day.
Speaker 2:I see it. So it's again like if we're talking about building muscle specifically in wrestling. It takes time, just like getting good with wrestling it takes time you're not going to start.
Speaker 2:You're training at wrestling and become overnight sensation, ready for TV. That's going to look at the challenge and go you know what. But if I stick with this I'll get to a top level. It's the exact same with gym and bodybuilding or weight loss. If it's important to you, you're willing to like, put yourself on the journey, you're willing to go through the pain, you're willing to sacrifice because you know at the end the payoff is so great and you're going to be so proud when you achieve those certain things that it's worth it. Do you mean like, like?
Speaker 2:That's why training legs now has probably become my favorite leg day or my favorite day of the week because of the mental grit. Like I can be having a bad day, but if I go and train legs and I put myself through that trauma, not only is my physique getting better because I like having big legs for wrestling and stuff, but I'm also building mental resilience, like in the gym when you grind and you work on yourself. Not only will you feel better when you leave. You'll never I don't think you'll ever feel worse leaving the gym after a workout than you did before you went in, even if it's just something. You've done something to try and work on yourself. But if you're pushing yourself past your comfort zone, don't get me wrong. A lot of people I see it going to the gym and they push machine from A to B and they're looking around and they're on their phone or on a treadmill.
Speaker 2:So physically they're at the gym but, mentally they're not there and they're not pushing their body nowhere near how hard they need to to actually force. Your body doesn't want to change, naturally. We could sit and never go to the gym in our life and our body would be fine. We'd be alive, it'd be fine, it'd be great. But if you want to change your physique, it it's hard and that's again where people go ah, it's going to take me a couple years, that's just jumping the juice, I'll just take steroids. Yeah, you want to build good, if you, if you're building the house, yeah, you've got to build good fundamentals first. There's no point just trying to build a house.
Speaker 2:It'll it'll collapse yeah it's the exact same in the gym. That's. That's a way I can try and get your fundamentals secure. First give yourself a year or two at least in the gym, training hard and then putting on muscle, or if you've got six months to a year on the line and you've seen no progress.
Speaker 2:Look at, look at yourself and go. Okay, maybe I need a coach that's going to help me. And if your coach is straight away going, oh mate, yeah, you just need to jump on the juice. Probably not a good coach, because any good coach would know, especially if you're a younger kid, it will take you time with your body and your genetics to start bulking out and get bigger. There's no quick fix.
Speaker 2:Unfortunately, most men, most wrestlers, physically, are in their prime in their probably 20s to 40, whereas when you're a kid growing up, you see all these and you just think, oh well, I need at 16, 17 unless you're a genetic freak, you're not going to be that big, you're not going to look that great, do you mean? So it's like, just stop jumping down the steroid route. There's a guy called sam sulik. At the moment he's really blowing up in bodybuilding. He's going to probably be something big. The guy is full of so much steroids but he's he's blown up on tiktok. He's like. He's like a number Arnold Schwarzenegger. All the younger generation are looking at him going, oh, his physique's sick, or they like his content and he's pushing the narrative again of oh, but you've got to be taking gear to get this big so you've got all these kids now that are watching someone else now and thinking, okay, well, the only way.
Speaker 2:I can get big is by taking steroids going back to the influence thing, and he knows what he's talking about and he trains hard but it's also but there's steroids involved yeah, so if you don't have the like mental stability to like go okay. Well, I like how he trains, I'll maybe. I'll maybe follow his workout program and maybe follow his nutrition program, but I'm going to train naturally first like you're going down just the steroid risk yeah, adam, I'm going to wrap it up.
Speaker 1:So what I have is some some quick 10 fire questions. Oh, I'd like to ask you quick, one word answers, if you can.
Speaker 2:Some people don't answer these very quickly I like to talk a lot, so here we go, yeah exactly this.
Speaker 1:This is the challenge for you.
Speaker 2:It's not answering the questions. It's answering them in one way. This is gonna be tough what's your favorite word? Uh see, you put me on the spot now. Two words Fuck it, I've got a tattoo to me. When life throws shit at you. Sometimes you've just got to say fuck it Sorry.
Speaker 1:Least favourite word.
Speaker 2:Cunt.
Speaker 1:Tell me something that excites you.
Speaker 2:Helping people.
Speaker 1:Tell me something that doesn't excite you.
Speaker 2:Limp broccoli.
Speaker 1:What sound or noise do you love?
Speaker 2:Women orgasming.
Speaker 1:What sound or noise do you hear?
Speaker 2:When my shaft goes limp, what?
Speaker 1:Does that make a noise Like a deflated balloon? Yeah, what's your favourite swear word? Fuck. What profession over the neuron would you like to attempt?
Speaker 2:Porn star.
Speaker 1:What profession, of course. What profession would you not like to do?
Speaker 2:What I'd not like to do.
Speaker 1:Chemistry teacher. And lastly, if heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the pearly gates?
Speaker 2:You were a good person.
Speaker 1:Nice, adam. Thank you so much for coming on the Believe in People podcast. You have been absolutely magnificent. Thank you Sweating after those questions and if you've enjoyed this coming on the Believing People podcast, you have been absolutely magnificent. Thank you, and if you've enjoyed this episode of the Believing People podcast, please check out the other episodes and hit that subscribe button. We're on Apple Music and Spotify, so please like and subscribe to be notified about our new episodes. You can also search for the Believing People podcast on your favourite listening device and, if you can leave us a review, that will really help us in getting our message out there and rising up the daily.
